Last One Of The Day

I promise. I swear!

This one isn’t even really super new but I heard this and it might be making me go paint SO

LDM

THANK YOU!!!!!!!

You little motherfucker, you know how to write a song.

(And it’s 3 PM and I should probably be feeding my dog breakfast.)

But first let me post this song.

These are why I don’t have kids. ^^^^^[Reasons]

(I went to type that, and I forgot to press shift and it turned up as 666, which is also, basically, true.)

A good song never gets old.

By the way, I don’t think kids need to like, they don’t eat on a schedule either, so I make fun of myself but I’m sure I’d be a fine parent. I don’t eat regular meals a day, and I don’t think kids need to, too.

JUST FOR CLARITY.

I’M SURE IT WOULD BE FINE. AND NOT LIKE THE CACTUS MY FRIEND GAVE ME THAT DIED AFTER A WEEK. I HOPE SHE DOESN’T READ THIS BLOG…

You were invited to the funeral, because I didn’t have one.

I don’t so much have an emotional attachment to kids, but if I did ever have them, I wouldn’t want them to die, solely because ever since I saw Trainspotting, I feel like dead babies are the freaking worst… I’m getting almost a little bit of panic as I write that, and honestly, that movie scarred me for life from ever having a baby that you accidentally go off on a heroin binge and let die…

I learned my lesson through film.

So that would be my main objective is just not to wake up to that.

I genuinely really like kids a lot, it’s just that, it’s kind of like, I enjoy them when they’re in front of me, but theoretically, I can take them or leave them; it’s just like, how I feel about people. It isn’t like, “OH KIDS!”

Sometimes I do cry from feeling emotional over how adorable they are and how like, incredible human beings they are and how funny and how sweet and how pure, but once they’re out of my vision, I’m back to okay.

Like, when people have those “BABY ON BOARD” stickers on their car, and it’s like, what are you trying to say? “OH! Thank god you told me. Because I was GOING to belligerently hit your car, but now that I know there’s a BABY ON BOARD, I most certainly won’t.”

Guess what. I used to be a baby, too. I’m just a 29 year old one. So is everyone else walking the planet. I don’t think people get special treatment because they are young. Not to mention, sometimes people think like tragedies are anything involving children, and don’t get me wrong, I never want anything bad to happen to ANYONE. But like, older people have lives and people who love them, too!

I don’t think your age determines your value to the whole human race, one way or the next.

Actually, I’m being hypocritical. Because I’m a female, actually, every time I have sex, because age is inversely proportionate to how valuable you are, I hang the sign in my car window that says, “Possible fetus on board”. But then I take it down again every time I get my period, because I’m not TRYING to get any special treatment that isn’t completely warranted.

And I put my period in the baby car seat.

Okay I kid. I kid.

(Oh, pun not intended but that was good.)

Sometimes I take things too far.

Even for me.

I don’t know why but I thought that was funny.

Anyway, back to the song.

WE WERE TALKING ABOUT PAINTING, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK.

Please, be serious. And please, keep to discussion.

Plus, I actually think kids are heartier than plants.

And also.

It’s kind of tricky having a cactus in Upstate New York.

But I really was sad when he died. Like, legitimately. I mean, not sad, but like, I genuinely loved that guy and I felt like he was Blue’s little friend. And also, he wasn’t CREEPY when he died, so, that also endeared him to me in my book.

Someday I’ll get another, when the emotional wound is gone.

Until then… I paint.

See below.

(It’s cactus catharsis.)

No, but in all seriousness, I can’t have a child carseat in my car because my dog thinks it’s for him, and then while he’s riding in it, he also uses it to try to launch himself out of the window, like as a step stool, or a step ladder, when he’s seeing other dogs he wants to play with, and we are part-way or completely stopped.

Which is also how I learned that for the next 77 years of his life (in human), I can PROBABLY never drive a convertible.

The things you do for your children.

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