This Lady Inspires!!!!

I was just saying yesterday to a friend, how I have been inspired by these “regular” people who don’t really have anything above and beyond in their lives, and some of them even have things that on paper, you’d say, “I don’t want that”– AND YET– AND YET– THEY ARE HAPPY! They are joyful! They have discovered a sort of secret to life that I am discovering, too, which is being happy “unconditionally”. 🙂 🙂 🙂

It’s about loving and appreciating yourself and those around you, and loosening up on yourself about having things JUST SO, and then, ironically, when you relax and start enjoying the things around you, the things around you start to shift. It has to start with you first!!!!! And isn’t that amazing! We hold the power to change because all things in our life begin within ourselves!


This lady is quite an example of that. Something I have found is that there are truly happy people on there, living their lives and really enjoying what is before them. These people are not rich or famous, but they are happy and they are uplifting other people, and more importantly, themselves!!!! And isn’t that the key!!! They love themselves and those around them, and that has become to me, the most inspiring thing!! I have seen people appreciating things lately that in the past I would have said, “You’re crazy… are we looking at the same thing?” And then I started to realize… the prize is in the loving! The prize is in the feeling good! The prize is in the beholding and the appreciating and the love! That’s where the feeling-good is! The prize isn’t about trying to control what comes to you; it’s about controlling your emotions in a way that they perpetually feel good to you!! It’s about directing your mind toward what you want and believing it is coming and taking inspired action along the way.

It isn’t just this lady’s weight loss I find amazing, although I know that represents a shift in positive energy for her too, it’s also her relationship with her partner, the way she appreciates nature and Disney, the way she shifted her mind on vacation going into a swimsuit for the first time, and all other sorts of things that EVERYONE can relate to. 🙂 🙂 🙂 I love seeing happy people!!!

Sending you love on this beautiful day 🙂 ❤ ❤ ❤

Okay Now That It’s The Monday Tomorrow

Get ready for a haunted castle and some Sesame Street!!!!!!!

🙂 🙂 🙂

:) :) :) :) :)

“So, what seems relevant here, is NEVER CARING AGAIN what anybody else thinks about what you’re doing. That’s the only freedom!

Because if you’re trying to jump through hoops to please them, then you’re not gonna feel light-hearted and you’re not going to feel free and you’re going to come to resent them so soon, you see.”

Autism, Amazing

This is a word that comes to mind to me a lot in terms of myself and my evolution, as I feel like I’m moving MORE in the direction of becoming some of those qualities myself and it’s something I am taking great enjoyment and pride in.

Literally, the better I am being, the more I am being myself, the happier and higher and more tuned in I am, the more autistic I feel. This is a word that has come to my mind countless times for many months now, as something to strive for always within myself.

I don’t really give a cut about explaining it to anyone else, I’m lazy, but luckily Abraham did a really good job with it.

I am watching this video now.

I love this lady, and I feel autistic with my mom and people all the time.  🙂 This was the word I was talking about the other day in my podcast that I didn’t bother touching because I felt it might be too contrasting and not worth explaining to anyone else. But I love this so much. So I searched Abraham and Autism and this is what I found– I have never seen this before and I love it.



I have ALWAYS said this about childhood development– things we call developmental delays are simply energy being focused somewhere else. If I have kids, I don’t care when or whether they walk, talk, or drive the car because I KNOW they have brilliancy in their own way, and it’s only when we cannot SEE that for ourselves, that we believe something has gone wrong. You don’t have to be genius in EVERY which way, or in whatever ways the world defines as good. You only have to be genius in the ways in which you set forth when you came, the ways in which you want and that matter to you. THAT LITERALLY IS IT.

Conforming to an arbitrary general population mundane regular normal checklist isn’t the point. BEING WHO YOU CAME TO BE IN THIS WORLD: IS.

If conforming to the world makes you happy, do it. If it doesn’t, don’t.


My Idea Of Romance

is someone who watches your kids while you SLEEP and changes diapers…

and this is pretty sweet too.



As you can tell, Shane just won’t shut up…

It’s hard to get a word in edge-wise with him. I don’t know why I stand it.

Brady + Physics + Pure Positive Energy

Love him. This is a really great interview.

I don’t follow football, but some things are applicable all over the board. I always love listening to positive people speak. It’s not a matter of the vocation, it’s about how tuned in they are.

He says:

“I’ve had a lot of experiences and I know what’s important and I know what’s not important and tend to use a very positive outlook in order to shape my own emotions and feelings. I use a lot of things for motivation.”

It’s always the same concept and energy and application.

It’s literally mathematical in its precision.

If you ever wonder how or why someone has gotten to be where they are, just listen to an interview with them. And conversely, you can start changing the way you think and speak, to effect the change you wish to desire. ❤

“Because we’ve had success, a lot of teams don’t like that … It’s a good problem to have.
If they don’t like you, you’re probably doing something right!”
“People who are gonna grouch and groan are gonna grump either way; may as well be because YOU have what YOU want.
– You can quote ME on that one. 🙂

You know that saying about you become who you hang out with? The beauty of the internet is that you have access to basically ANYBODY at your fingers. You get to choose whose speaking and ideas saturate your brain. You get to choose what to think and who to listen to and who to agree with and who feels right to you. It doesn’t have to be dependent on your “reality”. You have access to everything in the world!!!! You get to decide. YOU get to choose. You don’t have to listen to the people around you.

You get to decide who influences you.

Choose the direction of your life based on how it feels when you think it.

That’s how you know what is true in your heart.

ANYTHING is possible. ANYTHING you can imagine, is right within reach.

If you can think it, it’s yours.



You’re not here to fuck around with shit that doesn’t vitalize and interest you or with other people’s limited ideas of what is possible or real or necessary or right.

This isn’t purgatory.



I’m now going to go sip some tea in the garden surrounded by butterflies and the sound of Leonardo DaVinci playing the harp whilst I make a genteel watercolor with a paintbrush made from unicorn tail hairs, seated upon a mushroom, while I catch up with my neighborly human-size Caterpillar.

Happy SLEEP!

do you know how hard it is to keep your eyes open for a flash!!! well, now you do

Wow Guys

There really are no words.

I don’t know how to say it and I don’t know how to put it into words.

Oh firstly here is how my hair turned out.

In that last one I had to make sure it was just that I had a dirty mirror and not a dirty shirt.

Anyway. I’m really happy with that but that’s like so old news I took those pictures hours before I just am only having time now to post.

So I went to my friend’s shower and I was like perfectly on time (for me, it was perfect) and I showed up and… Firstly, okay, let me just say I was excited to go. I mean, I don’t really get excited for things until they occur, but I was envisioning positively. But firstly, I took forever getting there because today the weather was PICTURE PERFECT and I love being outside so much that I didn’t want to go and sit somewhere inside. I figured I’d probably be like, “Okay, I’m leaving now………” just to get back outdoors.

I am happy to say… I can’t actually say the words but let me say, I was wereong. Or something like that.

No really though it was OUTDOORS under a beautiful white tent so that was my first wish come true– I got to spend all day outdoors.


I had NO Idea this was going to occur. But second. I showed up and this fucking amazed me; this fucking BLEW me away. I show up and my friend JESS PHILLIPS is there who I haven’t seen in a year and a half, and before that, SO fucking long. And I had JUST had a dream about her and this girl named Marie sometime last week. And it was kind of one of those things there, I’m not on social media, I’m really bad with keeping up with people. I think of people all the time with love, but I kind of tend to just keep to the people who are physically within my life, in terms of keeping up with people. It’s not ever any lack of love; I just follow the path of least resistance and I’ve always kind of been like that.

So I see Jess, who I’ve known and been friends with since seventh grade (same as the girl whose shower it was) and then I see the ONE girl I expected to see there, who was also awesome. I only figured I’d know like, one person there. Then I see my friend named Justine, who I’ve known since FIFTH grade, and who I also had NO IDEA was going to be there and I probably haven’t seen her since some Phish show on lot in like 8 years.

Then I’m freaking out over seeing Jess and she tells me Marie is on her way. By the way, Jess has lived down south the last basically ten years, Marie has lived in Philly and New York, and Justine is now in Key West. So these people are like, traveling around and all this shit, I genuinely kind of never thought I’d ever see them again unless our paths randomly happened to meet. I thought it was cool and random Kelsey even invited me to her wedding because I love her so much but as I said I haven’t been the best at keeping in touch.

Plus my friend Mia, who I have kept in touch with to some degree from seeing her at hot yoga several years back, was also there.

So anyway.

Jess tells me Marie is coming, which really freaking blows my mind because as I said, I had a dream with both of them in it last week. And also, okay Jess is friends with one of my oldest friends Jackie, who also got married just a few weeks ago, and Jess is showing me pictures of Jackie’s wedding, which, out of everyone I have ever known, Jackie is one of the very few people whose wedding pictures could actually get me to be choking up, and I asked Jess to send me the link to Jackie’s wedding website thing from the photographer because I want to look at them more.

When I’m sober. Which is happening soon…

I basically am; it’s just the day drinking that’s getting to me because I am such a lightweight to begin with, let alone middle of the day. But I had so much fun I can never complain about that. I’m feeling really good now.

So Jess is showing me pictures and I am beside myself with joy, plus seeing Kelsey and her sister. Plus seeing their mom, and Jess’ mom. Plus seeing this girl I had never met before but who is super sweet.

So THEN FUCKING MARIE shows up. And let me tell you. There is no way to describe Marie. I have always said this about Marie and I’d say this about any of the people I just named, but honestly there’s just something about Marie that ANYONE who has ever met Marie will agree with me on, she is just completely one of a kind and herself and SO ridiculous you cannot help but love Marie and you have never met anyone anyone anyone in the world who is quite like Marie. I never thought that I would see her again, but I honestly always had such a deep place of love in my heart for her, always. I even wrote a blog post about her and a compliment she gave me (my Kanye is coming out) I will link it to you here.

But she has been someone who has, even though we have never spent honestly a whole lot of time together in terms of via comparison (I’m stealing that from another old friend) other people, she has always been someone who I resonated with on a really soul level, and like, she just totally… I don’t know how to explain it, there is no way to explain it, but she has always been magical to me and there’s something about her that my soul really loves. IT SOUNDS CHEESE as FUCK but it’s true. I can’t explain it but I am just so in love with Marie. Probably a piece of everyone who’s ever known her is.

So Marie shows up with fucking Veuve Clicquot; which, I happen to know that I adore from my cousin’s house at one Christmas party when I fell in love (with it, and also with being so drunk and KNOWING I wanted to have a baby, like STAT). And…

SO Marie is just always going to be NYC Audrey Hepburn to me for life. I just love her so much and the ENTIRE party was amazing. Being outside drinking champagne and pink wine with my friends under a white tent in June on a sunny day having fun, like, it doesn’t get any fucking better than that.

I came home and I was just telling my neighbor, you know…

I am a very loner person. I LOVE people but I often prefer to be on my own. I just have a head full of these imagination and dreams and I enjoy being by myself and off in my own world. There’s very few people in the world who can flow in and out with me like that and always kind of feel like they belong. And I appreciate and enjoy that about myself.

That being said, and I think BECAUSE of that precisely, it really blew me away seeing all of these girls today. And feeling like… kind of being reminded of some part of my past, that was a pretty big part of my past, especially since I never went away to school. I still made friends in college, but when you are commuting, it isn’t the same. Plus I always had a solid boyfriend who was my main thing, always. I feel like when people go away to college, a lot of times their college friends outweigh their high school ones, but because I never did that, those people I went to high school with, kind of always were the last of the clique in my mind.

And also… I think the craziest thing for me of all, was having this complete intersection of my life then and my life now. There is something indescribable to me, and I don’t know if anyone else has ever experienced anything like it, but you kind of can’t if you’re staying caught up with people all along.

But to somehow have this coalescence of your past and the life you are living now, where these people KNOW you and they GET you on some very deep levels, they watched you growing up, and somehow, you can fall right back into place and fall right back into being yourself, and it’s also the self that they know, and at the same time, you’re on a totally different tangent from now to where you were then. It’s amazing, in a way, to see that I AM the same person, exactly the same person, completely at my core, and also, I’m so different in so many ways, but ultimately, deep down, I am the same.

I am the same in the way you’re the same from day one until the day that you die, and I’m different in the way that you travel the country, and move through state to state. But you’re still in the same car.

It’s crazy when you’re talking with people and they can be mentioning things up from the last ten to fifteen years, and it is pertaining to you. And you could never even have remembered it, were it not for them bringing it up.

People who know you as if it’s in a dream. I don’t think I could feel that way if I talked to them often, and I love the fact that I’m so free, in a way, from any restraint of maintaining any friendship in the external realm, because I’m more content with living my own life. However. Today it reminded me just how intrinsic some of our relationships are. I truly feel now that for the rest of my life, if I didn’t already know it, these people are my friends. I had never given it any thought before, but knowing it now, I feel so appreciative and so blessed that I have these people in my life, if even from afar.

It was amazing to have this feeling of… yes. We do share a past. But also feeling as if they resonate with and understand me and who I am now, and into the future. All of this may sound really, incredibly weird, and I don’t mind if it does. It isn’t really about them at all; it’s about me. And it’s about me feeling SO happy and blessed (I’ll stop using that word now, I swear) that I’m still the same me and I’m still the same person who always I am, and I can still be THAT person, and also be everything that I still want to be.

I’m not saying that ANY of this matters. I’m just saying, that to me I had the experience that it does. I went into that with some preconceived notions and some certain ideas, and some things I was going to say, and instead I was blown away by feeling my own honesty coming forth from within me because I was opening up on some level to people who genuinely loved me and had an interest and wanted to know. And met me where I was. It was something I never, ever expected. It felt to me like those friendships were deeper all along than for which I had ever given them credit, and that was an amazing thing for me to behold.

Here is Marie. IMG_8579

She’s so amazing and this picture will never do her justice in any way but here she is and I love her and I think she is amazing in so many ways.

I’m still maybe SLIGHTLY feeling the effects of the fermented grapes I slugged down today HOWEVER I will edit this after I shave my neighbors head and get some McDonald’s food. OH ALSO I HAD THE BEST MINI CUPCAKE EVER OF MY LIFE TODAY TOO I’LL HAVE TO TELL YOU ABOUT THAT IN A LITTLE BIT.


Cutting This Mane Then Party!!!!!


Song Of The Day, From My Sis


My sister started out my day today by telling me to listen to this song because it reminded her of me and this was a huge compliment coming from her (you know how I fan my sister) but really I had never heard this song and I loved it so maybe you will too. I think that it says everything true about everything 🙂 ❤

She sent this to me, or told me to listen to it, just as I was having this thing go through my head, about being free. Then I played this song, and, well, you know the rest 🙂 🙂 🙂

I love you guys!!!!! Give some people some hugs and some smiles and enjoy your night!!!!!!!!!!

I’m So Excited

For writing and going to sleep and showering tonight. I feel like… I’m watching this Perez video that is so funny and ironic it’s almost making me spit out my water.

For some reason I totally love watching him do his little video logs and I DO NOT KNOW WHY. I’m like, fascinated seeing what he’s going to say, I think because in so many ways, it’s like, I like him, I feel he’s like my friend, but I don’t understand him or have the same perspective as him on SO many things that it literally like fascinates me and blows my mind and keeps me on the edge of my seat as to what he’s going to say next.

It’s not that I agree or disagree with him, it’s almost like we’re just inhabiting two totally different spheres of reference or mind. It’s intriguing to me!

Even if he ultimately has the kind of same idea of something as me, he comes to it from a completely different direction– it’s just absolutely fascinating to watch. And him having this like, “I really care about this topic” discussion whilst spraying his hair with hairspray in the bathroom (after carrying his laptop in there so he could keep video-chatting whilst fixing his hair) is like the most greatest thing ever.

I love him. I totally don’t get him and I know we’d be friends but be like, “What the fuck, how does this person think?” But anyway, he’s funny; he makes me laugh and I find his views fascinating and he gives me just enough trickle-down interesting news on the daily that I find interesting without overdoing it with things I genuinely have no interest in (sometimes he goes there, too, but I choose to focus on what I like). ANYWAY.

Today FLEW by like a flash. I feel like… I made so much fucking progress today; today was an amazing day in so many ways I can not even ever explain but my mind went on a journey that was above and beyond. It was a really good day. Also, I genuinely HAVE NO IDEA what I did… literally. I feel like I spent it in kind of a haze, but I love days like that, too.

I feel like I was on drugs, but in a good way. But like, where did the time go? No clue.

I genuinely have no idea what I did today or how to account for like, any of it. I have vague recollection of things, but… So weird.

I’m excited for the funeral tomorrow (quality time with my mom) and to do Jenny’s chair outside and to do some other things that I don’t even really know of yet but that’s half the fun. I’m also excited to maybe eek out a bit of sketch-writing before bed in my sketchbook and also take a shower right now and brush my TEETH AGAAAAIN because I genuinely live for brushing my teeth, and when I do it, I take so long. I’m very thorough.

So today, no idea where you went or what happened with you, but it has been extraordinarily good in terms of like, moving forward toward things I deeply, wonderfully desire. And I hope that same feeling belongs to you!!!!

I love being surprised and I love not knowing where things are going to take me, while also KNOWING that things that are going to happen, and feeling (and knowing) they are going to be so good.

I don’t know if I’m making any sense; my head feels like it’s been in the clouds. In that regard, it’s been one of the weirdest days ever, but for me, that actually means a sense of productivity in a strange way.

Alright that’s it for me tonight!!!!!!

All the love and sweetest dreams. Think of YOUR FAVORITE scenario IN THE WORLD that could EVER happen TO YOU tonight as you are going to sleep 🙂 🙂 🙂






By the way after viewing this I’m overly confident that I’d be fairly proficient in playing the triangle.

These Ghosts Know What They Are Talking About!!!!!!

“The best thing you could do for anyone that you love, is be happy! And the very worst thing that you could do for anyone that you love, is be unhappy, and then ask them to to try to change it, when there is nothing that anybody else can do that will make you happy. If it is your dominant intent to hold yourself in vibrational harmony with who you really are, you could never offer any action that would cause anybody else to be unhappy.”

— Abraham


And I got this hat! And I got pants! Leopard print pants!!!!

But MOSTLY I got to do a photoshoot with my dog BECAUSE HE WAS STUCK INSIDE MY CAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Somehow all of my things followed a certain color scheme. The last picture I took to send to my sister to make up for some biologically-correct pics I “accidentally” sent her at work (I don’t know her work schedule!!!). Highly advanced scientific studies conducted by me have shown that bright colors distract from past pain and suffering (which is why I always keep some on hand, just in case).

This was me having a Gloria Estefan dance party in my new leopard print pants. ^^^

Thank goodness I finally figured out how to use the damn timer.