Regarding frugality and my endorsement thereof:
Please note that being a good saver is not the same thing as being cheap. Being frugal is mostly something you do on your own. It usually doesn’t involve other people. It’s one thing if you suggest grabbing coffee or going for a walk versus a lunch date with a friend because you’re trying to save money. I think that’s smart and if you have a good friend, they’ll totally understand. Maybe they’ll be glad to save the bones, too!
But it’s another thing if you always let that friend pick up the tab, or you find yourself not tipping because you want to save a buck.
I enjoy giving generous tips, and I know it’s good karma 🙂 But I don’t often put myself in the position of where tipping is applicable, because at this point in my life, saving money is important to me. But being frugal is never an excuse to short someone who helped you out or offered you a service. That’s not being frugal, that’s called being cheap–and that’s not cool.
If you can’t or don’t want to spend the money, don’t put yourself in the position. It’s okay if you can’t do everything everyone else is doing. You’d be surprised how people respond when you decide to do things your own way; often you’ll find support where you least expected it. Maybe they were just suggesting an expensive date because they thought it’s what you’d want to do, you never know!
And let’s be real: you know in advance if you go out for drinks, order food to your home, go out to eat, get a massage, that you’re going to have to tip. If you can afford to do these extras, that means you can afford to tip. 🙂
If you can’t, then find another way to obtain your food (like the grocery store….) and forgo the special services until you’re in a better position financially. Don’t order food to your front door if you can’t tip generously. That’s a luxury, not a given. By the way, you could always drive yourself to get it, or you could just eat something from your own kitchen, which is usually cheaper and healthier anyway.
By the way, who do you think is paying for the car, gas, and insurance for the pizza guy to get there? He’s using his time and resources to bring you some dinner…so be kind. Use common sense and courtesy. Seeing how far you can stretch your dollars should be a fun challenge for yourself, not a burden to others.
And you never really know where other people stand until you get honest with them. Maybe you have a friend who’s trying to be better with money, too! Coming clean about where you’re at with your finances will feel awesomely freeing. Most people understand, at least good friends will, and you never know who may just want to join you on the frugal path to freedom.
And the saying is true– the best things in life really are free– like smiles 🙂